How many showers does it take to get a 3 year old clean...

I know it has been quite a while since I posted, but Meagan has been home for the summer, so I am not really Mr. Mom. We have been tag teaming it, and let me tell ya, it is much better than going it alone. Tonight, I have decided to share a very funny story with you that happened last night. Carson had just received his bath and was playing in his pajamas. Someone, who will remain nameless walked by and let a little toot out right above his head. He yells, Oooh! YUCK! I just took a bath, now I need another one.!!! So funny.

It's soooo Quiet....

A picture is worth a thousand words which means here are five thousand, so I don't need to say any more...




Well maybe just a little more. The top two are of this very moment, well, maybe not this very moment, but when I was writing this post. The next one of Carson is yesterday. Meagan came home to them asleep. The last two of Callie are ones that Carson took. He is becoming quite the photographer. I think we will get him one of those indestructible kid cameras for his birthday so that he will quit breaking ours.

Speaking of Target...

Last night we had to run to Target so that Meagan could get a gift card for a teacher at work who is having a baby. We decided to be quick so she went her way to look at stuff and Carson, Callie and I went ours. Carson likes those buggies that have the attachment where you can put two kids in. It is really handy when shopping for groceries because he goes there, Callie in the regular part of the buggy and the food in the big part. A place for everything and everything in it's place. When I am not doing grocery shopping, I don't like those because they are twice as long and not fun to drive. But Carson was being a good boy, so we obliged. They problem with them is that Carson cannot sit still. He has to be swinging from the bar or hanging out the side, just being MY son. I am always telling him to get back in before he hits someone or falls out. It was not very busy, but I am trying to break his bad habit. We started down the card isle, and sure enough he is hanging out the side of the buggy. There were some people coming so I told him to get back inside the cart, which he did, but immediately stuck his head back out to which I did not have time to react and he hit is head hard on a pillar in the middle of the isle. H..I..L..A..R..I..O..U..S..!!! They all started cracking up and he started to cry saying I wanna go home, dad, let's go home. So funny. Well it didn't stop him for long. As soon as I got him calmed down, he started right back doing his thing. Crazy kid!!!

Truly a scary moment...

There have been two time in my parenthood life that I have panicked. And on one of those occasions, I cried my eyes out. I know Meagan must have been scared to death because I think I am pretty good at hiding most of my emotions but on this one fateful day, all my emotion hiding would come unraveled. It was when Carson was about 4 or 5 months old. He had just started rolling around and I would make a conscious effort to wrap blankets or pillows around him if I was going to run and get something real quick. We were playing on my bed, which was pretty high up and I ran to grab something when I hear a BAM, instantly followed by wailing, lots and lots of wailing. Panic stricken I ran back into my room and Carson is obviously not on my bed. I look on the floor, and there he is laying face down, probably not freaking out as much as I was. When I picked him up, that is when I started to panic. He had landed on a tape dispenser, and it had cut him from his hair line down his nose and onto his face. I freaked because he was bleeding. It wasn't too bad, but something about seeing my baby bleed like that was traumatizing. I called Meagan, she was at work and was keeping myself in control until she got on the line. Then I broke down and she couldn't even understand what I was saying, so she naturally rushed home. Luckily it only took a few minutes. By the time she got home, he was asleep and I was on my way to being okay.

Now the second time I panicked was just the other night at Target. Carson informs me he needs to go potty and he wants me to take him. I usually cannot get him to go because when we get into the bathroom he informs me that he just wants to wait until we get home. Then runs out. This time he had to go bad enough that he actually went. We were in the stall and he finished up and then we washed our hands and were heading out when I decided I needed to go too. I told him to wait for a minute while I went, and he said Okay. So I proceeded to go and the next thing I hear is the door closing. I zipped up quickly and ran out. By the time I got out of the bathroom, he was gone. I ran back into the bathroom just to make sure he wasn't still in there, thinking to myself, he isn't that quick, but apparently he is. I ran back outside and started to panic a little. The bathrooms are right beside the doors outside and I thought to myself he would have thought that was a blast to activate the automatic doors. I ran to the closest isle and looked down it but could not see him anywhere. I ran back to the doors to look outside while I called Meagan. I remember thinking to myself please let him have run off to look for her. She answered and I asked if he was with her. She said no and I told her what happened. She started heading to the front. I peeked outside, didn't see him and said I was heading toward the toy department. The whole time terrible things going through my head. The store wasn't busy, but it really freaked me out that I didn't know which way he had ran. Eventually I found him running toward me coming from the toys. He ran up to me and said, "I'm looking for Momma." The whole time I was on the phone with Meg, so she knew that I had found him. It was a huge relief to see that little stinker running toward me. We explained to him it was not okay to run away from mom and dad even if he was looking for us, that he needs to stay with us all the time. It was not a fun time.

MMM...MMM...MMM...Tax Returns

Meagan and I have just recently come into some money. No, it's not a part of a bailout, we work for a living and pay our bills, so we don't get any free tax money...or do we. Now I will be the first to admit that I didn't pay a ton of taxes last year, but I was able to collect a nice return this year. Heavenly Father sure knew what he was doing when he sent Callie in December. We have been trying to figure out what to do with this sum of money. We kinda want to buy a bigger car, we don't quite have that much, at least a down payment. We also want to do some fixin' up around the house. We definitely cannot do both. So while we were contemplating what to do with our super mega jackpot, we went shopping. Meagan has been on a kick lately of food storage. We actually order something every month as part of a group at church. That way we get free shipping, which is good because our last order was 4 huge boxes, about 50 lbs each. That's a lotta free shipping cost and a lot of food, not all ours though. She has been on this kick, which is good because last year when I was laid off it was a bit of a shock, and we both panicked, but were not discouraged. Our goal was to be able to get to where we can survive if something like that happens again. I can safely say, we can survive. Today while we were at Sam's, we decided to take a little of that money and go crazy, on food storage. Last year, Meagan bought a food rotater, and our goal was to fill it up, and keep replacing food, and always keep it full. So, here in a Little corner of our kitchen is our collection of food storage and our sweet (we are so proud of it) food rotater. Now I feel like a little grocery store myself.



Pretty Sweet HUH?!


The bottom half
It's got a place for Number 10 cans so that is the option we got. I sorta kinda sometimes wish we got the one where the whole thing is smaller cans. But this has been pretty nice. I don't know how many # 10's we got, about 30 or so on those two shelves. It's pretty handy. Very sweet, pretty handy.

And of course my ever faithful helper...

Sweet Dreams...

Carson is cracking me up lately. On night this week he decides he wants to watch a movie as he is going to sleep. It is a cartoon called Word World. Well this works because he is at the point of being so tired, all he needs to do is lay still for 5 seconds and he is out.

The next night, I am putting him to bed and it happens again. This time he was ready for me with a movie already in the DVD player. So I agree to it, by the way this is after we have read a book and had prayers. I go turn on the TV and the movie and it starts. I walk out of the room, but then I hear some screaming. I walk into his room to see a bloody body on the screen. I laugh, because he has put in Indiana Jones, Raiders of the lost Ark. Carson loves this movie, but I didn't think of it as a good bedtime show. But once again, it worked and he was asleep within minutes.

The next night, once again, he wants a movie. I ask him before hand what movie, thinking I am outsmarting him, and he says I want a punch and a kick and to swing, oh and a whip. It didn't take long to figure that one out. Then he says, I want the one with his dad. (The Last Crusade) I persuaded him to stick to some cartoons.

All things MAN...

Carson wanted to play guns with me tonight. It reminded me of when he was barely talking, only making grunts and throaty noises. (Man in it's most raw form) One day he pointed his finger at Meagan and shot her making the gun noise, not so much a bang, more throaty, like I said. Meagan looks at me and asked if I taught him that, because apparently I am the teacher of all things MAN, which I don't deny. I told her I had not taught him that, but informed her that the finger gun with sound effects isn't something learned, it is instinct. Just as Peeing on the toilet seat, automatically jumping in water puddles even if they are not directly in your path and eating dirt. All... things... MAN.

So tonight, we learned a new phrase. Drop your gun...Sucker!!! I feel it is funny to laugh at and not inappropriate for a three year old to say. Although he did give me a run for my money trying to get him to sleep. He has lately decided to curl up on the couch instead of going to his bed. He won the battle tonight, but the war is far from over. I wouldn't let him play Nintendo before bed. I'll call that a draw.

A funny way to wake up...

This whole stay at home stuff is tougher than I figured it would be. My biggest problem is I like to go back to sleep after the 7 am feeding of the baby. I should just stay up because I can get some much more done. It is bad a few levels. First off, Carson always wakes up before me. That is bad itself on a few levels because I don't know what he is getting for breakfast, he watches TV or plays games. It is not good, but I enjoy my sleep. Every morning though, he comes and jumps in bed with me trying to wake me up. Normally it is a full out body slam, his onto mine, yelling, or a good old fashioned face lick, and I do mean my entire face!!! Well this morning it was the normal attempts before he gave up to go potty. So I am thinking to myself this is good, I get a few more minutes. Then I hear him playing with money. To fully understand his love of money, read Meagan's post, the worth of a quarter. Then I hear him run into our room with this money jingling. I think, oh man, he is going to lose all this change and knowing him, it's quarters. Then he gets right up in my face with no pajamas on just underwear and starts dancing. And this change is going crazy!!! Then he informs me, "Dad, I got quarters in my underwear!!!" And starts shaking his booty even more. It was a pretty funny way to wake up.

If your feeling angry...

I have had a lesson in life today. Things are a little tight around the Gold house at the moment, financially speaking of course. I had decided a while ago to do all my own car maintenance to save a little money. Well, that is not working out so well because it ends up costing us more than saving. Meagan has informed me that I am not longer allowed to work on her car, so her aunt's boyfriend, who is a certified mechanic does all the work for a really reduced price, and that is what actually saves us money. So we are trying to get the car running like it should, setting a little money aside every paycheck until her car is perfect, then we can work on mine. Well, for those of you who read Meagan's blog, you know I got pulled over on new years eve and got a $175 speeding ticket. It was not a good day but we'll recover.

Last night, we are driving home from being out, and Meagan sees this van, and just for kicks, she wonders (out loud for my benefit) how much it is. So I flip around and we do a little after hours car shopping for fun. There were other people on the lot, so I had turned my headlights off so I don't blind them. I still had my running lights and tail lights on, so it wasn't like I was driving around with none on at all. We finish looking, and get back on the road heading home. About a mile later, this cop is coming at us, and he flips around right behind me. I knew exactly what was going on, so I flipped on my headlights, but he pulled me over anyways. I figured he was just going to inform me, but no he gave me another ticket. I was so mad. I thought Meagan was going to cry. I still don't know how much it will cost, but he told me it would be less than a speeding ticket, a little reassuring. I was really upset the rest of the night. I had a hard time sleeping, and stayed up way late watching a movie until I finally went to sleep around 3 am. It was double trouble because I had to get up around 7 to get ready for a service project I had organized for my next door neighbor.

There is an older lady that lives next door all alone. She is a teacher like Meagan, but is fixing to retire at the end of this year. I kind of have a first hand knowledge of how much teachers make, granted she has been doing it a lot longer, and hopefully makes more. She has a huge spot in her yard where the ground has settled and it has sunk about 18 inches. We decided as an Elders Quorum to get some dirt and fill it in. The labor was really easy to get, but the dirt was a different story. After two weeks of searching, we found someone willing to donate however much we needed. It took about an hour and a half and two loads of probably 5 cubic yards each, but we got most of the low parts of her yard filled in. It was a lot of dirt, but totally worth it. I don't know how much money it would have cost her to have it done, but I know we saved her some. After all that took place, I totally feel better about things. The ticket isn't such a big deal anymore, especially since someone told us they know someone that may be able to get it dropped. I'm not holding my breath, but there is always the possibility. We'll see. So my life lesson is when your feeling bad about life or yourself or anything in general, go do something nice for someone else and it makes it all feel much better.

Ah, this crazy thing we call Weather...

And I hope I spelled that right because I stink at spelling, and the late hour only hinders my ability to attempt a word with so many different ways of spelling it. That is why spell check is not very helpful. It says I spelled it right, but it may not be the right one to use. Sometimes, I don't like the English language. For instance, why oh why is the word abbreviation such a long word?? It just doesn't make since. No wonder Spanish is taking over. Bye the way...

Do you know what you call someone who speaks two languages? Yup, Bilingual...

Do you know what you call someone who speaks three languages? A little harder, but I believe Trilingual. Maybe, maybe not, someone correct me if I'm wrong.

Do you know what you call someone who speaks one language? This one is a bit harder, but I know as soon as I tell you, your going to say, oh yeah, that's right. Give up, well that person is an American!!!

By the way, if you haven't figured it out, the late hour also gets me sidetracked....

So about the climate, that is such a better word to use, and I can spell it. I was talking to my buddy Brad, and he lives in the frozen north, Buffalo, NY. I asked him about the climate, and he told me it warmed up today to around 16 degrees. It was nice to get out of the negatives he mentions to me. I told him, well, I was outside working today, and at first I had a jacket on, but as the sun came out and I got more heated up, I took my jacket off, and was in my t-shirt. I think it warmed up to about 55 today. It was nice to get out of the 40's. We don't like taking Callie in that cold cold climate. If you are feeling bad for me for having this tropical paradise, just think about me this summer, cutting grass on base when it is 110, with 100% humidity. Then you can laugh at me, but in the meantime, I laugh in all your general directions...north!!!

Watch your language daddy...

I don't use bad language, that is what I used to think until I had a three year old parrot. One day we were outside playing on the swing. We live down the street from a fire station and Carson loves seeing the trucks go by. As soon as he hears a siren he is heading for the door to see the firetruck. This day there just happen to be two firetrucks and about three cop cars go by. Needless to say it was a nice little procession of sirens and lights and Carson ate it up. As soon as they had all gone by, he runs up to me and says, "Holy Crap Dad, did you see all the policemen and firetrucks!?" I was shocked. I have been getting pretty good at understanding what he says but sometimes I have a little trouble getting what he says but on this occasion no problem at all. Since then we have been really listening to what he says because come to find out, that is not the only one he uses. Another day he picked up a stick and said, "Dad, this stick is freaking huge!!!" When he says these things, I know I shouldn't laugh, but it is just so hard. And because I laugh, he says it more. We have tried to teach him to say, Holy Mollie or Holy Hannah or something other than holy crap. I have really started watching myself and the things I say so that he won't repeat them. Could you imagine him being at church or something and saying, Holy Crap Dad, that was Freaking awesome!! Let's hope not.

The reason I wrote about this tonight even though I have posted a few already is because our little parrot was put to bed ad 9:15. At 9:30 he decided to get up and get a drink, pee, brush his teeth, anything he could think of to stay our of bed. When he was brushing his teeth I asked what he was doing out of bed and he said, "I need to brush my teeth so they don't get rotten and fall out." At 10:30 Meagan was going to sit down on the couch to feed Callie when she found the crumbs of a muffin Carson had eaten, not at the table like he was suppose to but while sitting on the couch. She says, "OOOH Carson, I am going to spank his little butt!!!" Then we hear, "what momma, why are you gonna spank my little butt?"

I love this kid!!! Finally he is asleep. That is his little Puppy.

With a little help from my wife...

I have moved up in the technologicalness of blogging with Meg's help. She found this SWEET page for me because I enjoy video games and she knows it, but not so much to where all I do is play. I have also added pictures and some fun gadgets. Please do enjoy.

Haircuts all around...

Today was a day of haircuts. I have given up on trying to convince Carson that he needs his done and left it to Meagan. She is so much better at getting him to do things he does not want to, come to think of it, me too. She somehow convinced him that today was the day for a haircut and so it was. We all gathered in the bathroom and I was successful in the attempted buzz as you can see. Not too bad if you ask me but it did remind me of a time when I was not so good...
One day last year, I can't quite remember when, I attempted a haircut all by myself. That was a mistake. You see the way we are successful at this endeavor is that Meagan's job is to run distractions. She keeps his attention long enough for me to get a few good swipes in with the clippers, then we let him vacuum up the hair, and then go for a few more swipes. This process continues until it is good and buzzed. Well this one and only time I tried it alone and it did not come out so well. He was starting to throw a fit and shook his head and knocked the guard off the clippers all while they were still going, rather close to his head, and I took a huge chunk of hair out of the back of his head down to the skin. It was bad!!! So I did the only thing I could think of, and buzzed his whole head down as low as it would go. That is why from now on, I wait for Meg.

Meagan also got a haircut today. I like it a lot. She likes it because she can style it now and not just throw it back into a pony tail all the time. She looks hot!!!

The best breakfast ever...

Not too long ago, Carson woke up before the sun had come up. This was before the baby was born so Meagan was at work and it was just Carson and me. He comes into my bed and says, "Dad, I am going to get some breakfast." I told him that was okay because we leave cereal and pop tarts low enough so he can reach them. He eats the cereal out of the box, and pop tarts cold, unless I am with him then he wants it in the toaster. So I after a few minutes I got out of bed to see that he has helped himself to the best breakfast ever...vanilla ice cream. And the best part is that he is eating it with a straw, so there are a ton of little holes all in the ice cream. This little turkey didn't even get the ice cream from our box freezer on the floor, no he goes and gets the step ladder and climbs up to the freezer on top of the fridge. What a little monkey!!!

I know I am too fat when...

Meagan and I have started the year off right. We are now walking everyday at a park close by our house. Carson is really loving going because he gets to run run run and we get him wore out for bedtime. It works out really well. Let me give you a little insight as to what has led up to this point in my life.

I know I am too fat when...

...I go to put on my seat belt and I honk the horn as I pull the belt across my chest. (twice so far)

...my button up dress shirt unbuttons itself.

...I split my pants down my butt when bending over.

...I can balance a plate of food on my belly when eating...no table needed.

...Feeding Callie at night the other night, I sat in our recliner and it just broke...Solid wood, broke.

...I need to replace the shocks on my car because they make a funny noise when I get in the car.

...my three year old can outrun me at the walking park.

That has been to motivation behind wanting to lose poundage. So far this year I have lost around 10 lbs. I am very happy with that. My goal is 50, but I would not complain if I hit 100. Meagan thinks I would be deathly skinny. We shall see.


Sorry LeGrand, this was the best picture I could find of my gut with my shirt on. On another note My Brother LeGrand and I have thrown up the thought of trying out for the biggest loser and shoot for the grand prize. Our strategy was to gain as much weight as we could before the show and then we would be able to lose more and win. I think it sounds like a good idea!!!